(Re)Learning Your Needs Through 3 questions
Becoming a mother was the biggest transitional phase I ever experienced. My kids are 3 & 1 years old and I still feel like I am learning how to do this “mother” thing. I’m just happy to be a part of the club! This blog post is beneficial for all women, mothers or not. We have needs, cycles and societal conditions that affect the way we are. When I became a mom, I grew more attuned to these conditions and realized my needs were changing.
Take it day by day
One of my biggest takeaways from motherhood is leaning into the morning and listening to my body. How am I feeling physically and mentally? What do I need to feel my best?
If you’re like me, you’re sensitive to textures and the way things feel on your body. If my robe isn’t warm and comfy I don’t know if I’ll be able to get through those rough hours 4:00pm - 8:00pm (The mamas who know, know what I’m talking about lol). Below are three questions I ask myself as my day begins.
Question #1: How does my body feel?
Ask this question when you wake up in the morning. Did you sleep alright? Do you have neck pain or cloudy eyes? Zeroing into how your body is operating in the morning can help find relief for the rest of your day.
Question #2: What am I grateful for?
Gratitude sets the tone for the rest of the day. Yes I know, trust me I KNOW life can crap on us at times. I find it challenging to be grateful too and sometimes I need a moment to complain (and there’s nothing wrong with that). But I feel so much better when I have an ounce of thankfulness in my thoughts. If you are like me, you enjoy praying to God, but being thankful can be secular no matter your faith. We can be thankful for simple things such as our abilities to breathe, a relationship we have with a dear friend or the beauty of the sun.
Question #3: What are 1-3 things I can do to manifest joy?
Of these three things, I like to make 1 thing about giving joy to someone else. Each day is different and change is inevitable. For example, during the cold months our local daycare closed, so Marquez and I had to change our schedules to figure out how to take care of the kids. I felt a bit frustrated that my plans had to change but I also looked forward to spending the day with my little ones.
I knew I’d have to add more self care such as making time for myself during nap time or asking Marquez for extra help in areas I usually don’t need help with.
Some of my small self care rituals include taking a rest in-between tasks, not skipping out on my night-time skin routine, and limiting screen time when I am really supposed to be resting.
